![]() It was late afternoon, around the time that we’d usually schedule a quick afternoon break. Our boss, my coworkers, and I have a deal that we usually just change on the register each day, and that the one attending the register that day will solely focus on it and will leave tasks around the store for the others.Īlongside toys, we also sell stationery and maternity supplies, including prams, baby walkers, and high chairs. I work as a toy shop cashier and shop assistant with a twelve-hour workday schedule. Guardian of Psychic-Magical-Alien Kids, thanks for my mocha that afternoon! Thank you for your patience.”Ĭustomer: “This was more fun than I expected to have today. Manager: “We refuse to give him the satisfaction. The year before that, they were part-alien kids who teleported out from under an eighteen-wheeler!”Ĭustomer: “I think you all should write a book about him.” Last year, they were magical Wiccan children who might have been fathered by a god on Halloween. Manager: “That man calls once a year, always with the most outlandish stories about his adoptive children. I apologized in advance and then helped other customers while the manager was on the phone trying to placate this man. I’ll just be a minute.”Ĭustomer: “Oh, no, don’t be sorry. I put him on hold and looked at the customer at the desk. Me: “Sir, we do not have parenting books for psychic children, nor do we carry home birthing kits.”Ĭaller: “This is terrible customer service, and me, a grieving adoptive parent! Get me your manager!” The customer who had come up to the desk lifted their eyebrows.Ĭaller: “…and I worry that they may bring unquiet spirits to haunt the house, or that they might use their telekinesis to destroy items in their grief.”Ĭaller: “The oldest is a teenage girl, and I think she may have been impregnated by one of the spirits - which reminds me, do you carry home birthing kits? We don’t trust hospitals anymore.” Me: “Yes, sir, was there something in particular-”Ĭaller: “…and of course, all four children are heartbroken, so much so that their psychic powers are developing apace…” I looked up to see someone approaching the information desk and smiled apologetically at them. You see, I have become the guardian of four children after their parents - my best friends, my soul’s companions - died within weeks of each other of three different types of cancer apiece…” Do you carry parenting books?”Ĭaller: “Good, because I have a very special parenting matter. In the brief lull between customers, the phone rang.Ĭaller: “Hello. Years ago, during my time at a bookstore, I was staffing the information desk on a busy weekend afternoon.
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